Every morning I have a ritual – no matter how early I get up (well, anything 4:30 AM onwards) I start to give thanks for everything that I have. I go over everything I can think of that I am grateful for in that bunch of minutes, even if I repeat it over and over again. The second it pops into my mind, it’s being thanked for.
Every. Single. Time.
My routine is quite simple.
I immediately start to think of the things I am grateful for; I go over these things for five to ten minutes while I lay in bed.
I smile while doing this.
I feel the happiness of being alive. I feel the happiness of being grateful for all that I have. I truly feel it. I go over the top three goals I have for myself, minimum,
and I try and feel what it feels like to have them.
I state my intention for the day then I get out of bed.
Then I walk to the kitchen and make my coffee.
After, I learn. I read a book that helps me grow for five to thirty minutes, depending on the time I have.
Then I get ready for work if it’s a workday.
After doing this for only one week, I have noticed a huge shift in my thinking about absolutely everything. I feel like it’s getting harder and harder to feel anger. I look at things as they are; I try not to judge good or bad. I see the beauty in things, people and experiences that I normally wouldn’t and I do my best to not let any negative thoughts slip through my mind.
Today was a day in which tested my ability to stay strong and positive in a normally negative situation. I woke up at 5:30 AM to see a text sent to me late the night before which was quite hurtful. As I read this text, all of anger started to rush through my body.
I kept telling myself to calm down and this wasn’t anything to get upset about.
“You can get through this.”
But I couldn’t. No matter how much I would tell myself it was OK, for the first few minutes that blood and energy was racing through my veins so fast, I couldn’t let my mind relax and see the situation for what it was. My hands were shaking, my heart was racing, the internal cursing started (because my kids were sleeping beside me) and I felt like everything I was working towards was about to end.
I angrily started to text back while my arms and hands were shaking uncontrollably. I wrote out my frustrations in the moment then I erased most of it a minute later; then I started writing all over again and erased a couple more times. I had so much to say about the topic since I felt attacked and disrespected. I did this for a good five minutes, all while conversing with myself inside my own mind as to all the things I should bring up.
Then I stopped and simply asked,
“Why am I letting this person ruin my day? Why am I allowing myself to give them my positive angry and switching it for negative energy converted into anger? I am wasting good energy on someone else’s thought process and that’s not fair to me.”
I didn’t give them nor myself an excuse or reason as to why they had sent that message because in the end, it doesn’t really matter. I can allow the reason to matter if I give it the energy but I didn’t.
No one deserves to take the positivity that we bring into the world or to ourselves, away from us for any reason. And that’s exactly what happened. I reacted the way I would have normally reacted and therefore allowed for an even lengthier opportunity for them to steal that good energy and positive thinking away from me and replace it with anger.
Once I realized exactly what was happening, when I could feel the negative energy surrounding me, I asked that question and it was a lightbulb. Then I removed the threatening tone of my text and responded with a simple and straightforward answer that needed no response. Truly.
I placed the phone down beside my bed, closed my eyes and began with giving thanks and being grateful for what I had, what I had just learned and what I am excited for in the future.
When I hopped off the streetcar a couple of hours later to head into work, I didn’t dread going into work, I was excited. I crossed the street giving thanks for the amazing city I live in, the opportunities that I have, the people I have helped, the people I love, the ability to walk, talk, taste, smell and hear. Just the simple things but some of those are the most important things as well.
I felt like I was back. I felt like my Self.
When situations arise that bring negativity to our lives from others, it’s easy for us to just flip our lids and snap back with negativity but that just adds fuel to the fire. The fire within you. Sure it can add fire to the siutation between you and another but what is worse is that it will have a much longer negative effect than you think, internally. I have been a slave to the fire for so many years as I am sure we all have.
But, remember that your happiness is yours, this is your energy to do with what you please and no one else’s.
You are also responsible for it and only you can decide whether you give it up to others and replace it with the energy of negativity or keep that great energy that is you, to yourself, move on enjoy your day, enjoy what each day had to offer and move on.